Legend of the Dog-Faced Woman

My aunt. I shudder at the very thought of her.. she's horrible.
Picture this - a short, wide middle-aged woman who lives in regional Victoria. In an effort to be 'trendy', she has orangey straightened hair cut in layers around her shoulders, clashing nastily with her rosacea-ravaged skin. She never wears any makeup and dresses in anything neutral coloured, box-shaped or masculine. Her voice is enough to strip the paint or flesh from anything and send me into spasms... but the worst part is what comes out of her mouth.
Never before have I met anybody so pig-headed, small-minded, selfish, stupid, unreasonably arrogant, racist, rude and idiotic as her. She's quite simply a waste of space.

Today at my cousin's birthday party, we were sitting on the patio talking about Al Gore. My Dad was telling the others about his views and what he had seen in An Inconvenient Truth about global warming. My Dad actually works in sustainable energy and has the EPA's phone number on speed dial, so it's all very relevant for him. He was talking about how dire things would be if the ice cap on top of Greenland did slip, how it would trigger major tsunamis that would affect countries next to the Atlantic, how the sea would rise 20ft resulting in many major city centres being underwater.
All my Aunt asked was, "What about R___ [the regional town she lives in]? Will it be underwater?".
My Dad said, "Probably not, it's a fair way above sea level."
She started laughing and said, "Good, because that's all I care about. Ha, imagine that.. I'd have a beach front property! Wonder how much that'd sell for.. two acres right on the beach!" She then started laughing.
I looked at her like she'd just shot baby Jesus in the head, and my other Aunts clued in and told her to shut up. What a cow and a half.. I couldn't believe that anybody could be so callous and stupid.

More happened though.. I have a new cousin, who I did not know about. She is apparently a couple of weeks old, and absolutely tiny. Everybody was commenting on how much weight she'd put on, and I felt sick. She was miniscule and very frail looking - her mother smoked and drank copiously all through the pregnancy. It's disgusting. She shouldn't have been allowed to have a child. At the gathering, she just foisted her baby off onto everybody else and sat around outside smoking and drinking again. Unbelievable.
It's petty, I know, but I am annoyed that she and I share the same middle name - Rose (yes, Rose is my middle name in real life). My grandmother's middle name is Rose, her daughter is called Rosemarie, and I (her granddaughter) has Rose as my middle name. When my parents had me, they asked my grandmother if they could use the name as a way of honouring her. Since me, two more of her granddaughters have had Rose as their middle name.. without asking, and it's ticking me off.

Grrr! Bad vibes everywhere!